Thursday 31 December 2015

Flavours of the Month: December 2015...

Zombies, assassins, spies, and Jedis ... just some of what's been flavouring my December 2015...

Click "READ MORE" below to see this month's looks, sounds, vibes & flavours...

Sunday 27 December 2015

Tremors 5: Bloodlines - Mini Review...

What's it about?
Burt Gummer - graboid hunter extraordinaire - is now a survivalist reality show host, but he's pulled back into action when a man from the South African government turns up in search of his help. Joined by Travis, a laid back stunt rider, they discover that the graboid/shrieker/ass blaster family aren't solely an issue for North America and Mexico - there's an entire African bloodline with their own evolutionary surprises out there causing havoc.
Who would I recognise in it?
Michael Gross, Jamie Kennedy.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
It's been years since we've had anything from the Tremors franchise, and coming off the back of a sorely under-funded third film, an intriguing but strangely repetitive fourth film, and a one-season TV show of variable quality, a new entry is a somewhat surprising occurrence...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue the mini review...

Wednesday 16 December 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Space Vampires and Con-Artist Chemistry...

Lifeforce:
What's it about?
The crew of a space shuttle following the trail of Halley's Comet encounter a strange, alien craft hiding within the comet's tail. Inside things only get curiouser as they discover countless dried-up vampire bat-like creatures floating within the cavernous confines of the ship - and then they stumble across three nude figures in suspended animation. The strangest thing of all is that they appear to be human. However, when the space shuttle returns to earth, the ground team discover there's been a terrible fire that's wiped out the crew - but left the three humanoids intact. Back on Earth - London to be exact - events take a turn for the worse when the lifeforms awake and start to literally suck the life out of people!
Who would I recognise in it?
Steve Railsback, Patrick Stewart, Peter Firth, Frank Finlay, Mathilda May, Aubrey Morris, Michael Gothard.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Directed by Tobe Hooper (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre), co-written by Dan O'Bannon (Alien, Return of the Living Dead), and presented by Cannon Films during their 1980s heyday, Lifeforce has the genre credentials from the get-go. Based on Colin Wilson's novel "The Space Vampires" (surely a much better title than the non-specific "Lifeforce"), Hooper's film turns out to be a surprisingly fun outing. Jam-packed with special effects - from gruesome prosthetics and puppets to please horror fans, to a vast array of colourful optical effects to please sci-fi fans - Lifeforce unfurls in its final act into a stunningly epic extravaganza by way of a mystery. At just shy of two hours it's a touch overlong (and some plotting is either drawn out or repetitious), but the sheer volume of chaos and spectacle paper over the cracks (at $25m it was Cannon's largest film budget at that time) ... and that's without even mentioning Mathilda May's jaw-dropping beauty as the lead 'space vampire' who spends much of the movie seducing every male she encounters with all of her kit off (so that checks off fans of boobs, too!). If you're looking for something cheesy, something fun, something genre-tastic, ever-so-80s, and visually stunning, then it's worth checking out this somewhat-forgotten-about slice of sci-fi horror wham-bam mania. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for 'Focus'...

Wednesday 2 December 2015

The ABCs of Death 2 (2015) DVD Review


Find more horror movie reviews here.


Amongst the recent upswing in anthology horror movies, we've had three V/H/S flicks (so far), and now we've got The ABCs of Death 2, which returns to the '26 Directors, 26 Ways to Die' formula that produced such a varied – and often downright bizarre – series of short films, where crazed invention ruled above all else. Naturally, with such varied films (and filmmakers), the results are mixed – read on for a run-down of the Hits, Misses, and OK inbetweeners. N.B. This is my personal take: film viewing is subjective, and your mileage with The ABCs of Death 2 may vary.

A is for “Amateur” (E.L. Katz):
Kicking things off in a high energy, music video style, the first of twenty-six shorts details the exploits of an assassin – but the perfect hit turns out to be a far more difficult (not to mention grubbier and more painful) affair than intended. Featuring Andy Nyman (Severance), this is a darkly comic treat. HIT.


B is for “Badger” (Julian Barratt):
A found footage style entry set during the recording of a nature documentary called “Toland's World”, with The Mighty Boosh's Julian Barratt as a preening Attenborough wannabe. A nearby nuclear power station seems to have killed off the local badger population – or has it? Typically British in its understated humour, but the jump scare fails to startle … good gore, though. OK.

Click “READ MORE” below to learn your ABCs all over again...

Monday 30 November 2015

Bigger Tease Edition: The Walking Dead 6x08 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes here.

Well that was a bit of a cliffhanger, wasn't it? Oh, those big teases!

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Feelin' festive?

Click "READ MORE" below to see the rest of this week's memes...

Sunday 29 November 2015

Flavours of the Month: November 2015

Deliciously dark drama, refreshed writing, and a chainsaw-wielding ass kicker...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's looks, sounds, vibes & flavours...

Friday 27 November 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Naughty Bears and Loving Aliens...

Ted 2:
What's it about?
When Ted's status as a 'person' is called into question by the state, the little fuzzy chaos machine and his 'Thunder Buddy' John - with the help of a pot-smoking newbie lawyer - must fight for Ted's civil rights. Naturally, gross-out gags and mucky-mouthed silliness ensues.
Who would I recognise in it?
Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Amanda Seyfried, Giovanni Ribisi, John Slattery, Jessica Barth, Morgan Freeman, and more.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Having read some less-than-kind reviews of this follow-up to the well-received original, I couldn't help but think "Why?" Featuring a solid story (the fight for a sentient teddy bear's civil rights proves to be surprisingly involving) and several laugh-out-loud gags to accompany the general mirth, Ted 2 is just as much fun as Ted. A handful of resurrected jokes from the first movie do threaten to derail proceedings and send it careening down into a pit of self-referential 'remember this' laziness, but these call backs are soon dispensed with as the main thrust of the plot takes hold. It may not be as fresh as it once was, but what else would you expect? It's a sequel, after all - but MacFarlane, after a wobble with the patchy "A Million Ways To Die In The West", manages to give fans what they want and tell a good story. Arguably it's a smidge overlong (the Extended Edition adds in 11 minutes), but even scenes like the indulgent opening musical number are entertaining enough to paper over the cracks. The replacement of Mila Kunis with Amanda Seyfried (as new love interest Samantha L. Jackson) is well handled and allows the immaturity of John and Ted to run wild, sensibly leaving the "it's about time you grew up" shtick to the original movie. A little mustier around the frayed edges, but still as much fun as ever - if you dug Ted, you'll dig Ted 2. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for an intergalactic love story...

Monday 23 November 2015

About Damn Time Edition: The Walking Dead 6x07 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes here.

Only one more episode to go before the mid-season break and I cannot wait to see the proverbial brown stuff splatter all over the fan!

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Feel the burn, Rick...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes...

Saturday 21 November 2015

Amsterdamned (Dick Maas, 1988) DVD Review


Find more Shameless Screen Entertainment DVD reviews here.


“Be glad you're afraid – it means you're still alive.” A slasher thriller version of a Dirty Harry movie by way of the canals and 'red light district' of Holland's capital city, Dick Maas' third film combines elements of bloody European murder mysteries with sardonic American police action flicks. Lurking in the murky depths of Amsterdam's world famous waterways is a crazed killer, in what is one of the most uniquely located killer thrillers ever made...

 
Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Monday 16 November 2015

Sweet Talk Edition: The Walking Dead 6x06 memes...

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Just the one meme today, well, two versions of the same idea...

Click the image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Smooth ... Dolphin Smooth, even.

Click "READ MORE" below for the other version of Abraham's latest words of wisdom...

Monday 9 November 2015

Cookies and Kisses Edition: The Walking Dead 6x05 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes here.

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: The kid's got a one-tracked mind...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes **EPISODE SPOILERS AHEAD**...

Thursday 5 November 2015

SS Experiment Camp (Sergio Garrone, 1976) DVD Review


Find more exploitation reviews here.


“All this happiness is frightening.” If Don Edmonds' Ilsa: She-Wolf of the SS is the poster girl for Naziploitation, then Sergio Garrone's SS Experiment Camp (aka Captive Women II: Orgies of the Damned) is the poster boy, literally, one could argue. At the beginning of the 1980s, the United Kingdom was wrapped up in a moral panic: the notorious 'Video Nasties' era, which was spurned on by the grisly, shocking, and altogether lurid cover art that adorned the shelves of countless video rental shops. Self-appointed 'Moral Campaigners' – from crusty old busy bodies who saw no point in actually viewing the material they so vehemently opposed, to the entire political establishment – marched about in a blue rinse fury, which the majority of newspapers were only too willing to embolden. Splashed across front pages and evening news reports was the graphic box art of various exploitation flicks – including that of Garrone's decidedly trashy slice of grindhouse grot, which was banned in the UK from 1976 until 2005. If you're easily offended, then why on earth are you reading about a movie like this? However, if you're not consumed by a perpetual tide of offence-taking, and recognise that a movie is just a movie, then strap in for something nasty...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Monday 2 November 2015

Big Tease Edition: The Walking Dead 6x04 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes HERE.

An extended episode this week - but no conclusion to last week's double cliffhanger - oh, those big teases!

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Dang it!

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes **EPISODE SPOILER AHEAD**...

Friday 30 October 2015

Flavours of the Month: October 2015...

Ghastly goings on, time travel shenanigans, and dark tales are just some of the things that have been setting the tone for my October 2015...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's Looks, Sounds, Vibes & Flavours...

Monday 26 October 2015

Terrible Mystery Edition: The Walking Dead 6x03 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes HERE.

Wow! That was a bit of a rough one this week, wasn't it? Just when you were expecting a little lull before next week's extended episode, you get a right old kicking...

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: It's a laugh-a-minute in the zombie apocalypse...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's bumper crop of memes **WARNING: EPISODE SPOILERS AHEAD!!!**...

Saturday 24 October 2015

Bloodsucking Pharaohs In Pittsburgh (Dean Tschetter, 1991) DVD Review


Find more exploitation reviews here.


“They had a deadly appetite for life!” There are film titles, and then there are film titles – this is the latter. Considering that this kooky comedy horror flick was originally called “Picking Up The Pieces” (which sounds like a weepy TV movie melodrama), they clearly made the right choice in the end. A bonkers blend of Blood Feast by way of The Toolbox Murders, someone is sawing, sucking, and altogether splattering their way through the streets of Pittsburgh, in a case that mysteriously resembles a similar gore-drenched escapade in Vegas – a gruesome series of crimes that has followed the migrating showgirls and pros of America's sleazy gambling paradise all the way to Steel Town...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Monday 19 October 2015

Haircut Edition: The Walking Dead 6x02 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes HERE.

More blood-soaked action from our favourite zombie slayers, and even after all of that there's still a load more trouble on its way!

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Now that's a good use of time...

Click "READ MORE" for the rest of this week's memes **SPOILERS AHEAD**...

Saturday 17 October 2015

Triple Bill Mini Musings: Exes, Voices, and Maxes...

Burying The Ex:
What's it about?
Max, a horror nerd, comes to realise his horny environmentalist vegan girlfriend Evelyn isn't exactly a match for him, so he decides to dump her. However, a spanner in the works comes in the form of a bus - which promptly runs over his soon-to-be-ex. Sufficiently grieved, our young hero starts a new relationship with someone far suited to him (Olivia, a fellow horror fan and novelty ice cream shop owner). Trouble is, our boy's dead ex-girlfriend is back from the dead, un-killable, and distinctly unaware that they're no longer in a relationship!
Who would I recognise in it?
Anton Yelchin, Ashley Greene, Alexandria Daddario, Oliver Cooper, Dick Miller.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Joe Dante makes a welcome return to our screens with this L.A.-set, cine-literate (Romero references, the horror of a folded film poster) slice of comedy horror. It's an efficiently told, sparky, and decidedly fun ride. Dante fans would do well to check it out, and in the - admittedly slim - sub-genre of the 'rom-zom-com', Burying The Ex is the best entry since Shaun of the Dead (although don't go in expecting something as blow-you-over-fantastic as Edgar Wright's audience favourite). Gleefully silly and occasionally quite gooey. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for weirdo Ryan Reynolds and feral Tom Hardy...

Monday 12 October 2015

Mullet Edition: The Walking Dead 6x01 memes...

Find more Walking Dead memes HERE.

A bit of an epic zombie dream come true in this bumper-size Season 6 premiere episode of TWD, and with a few dashes of much appreciated levity in the dialogue to keep the mood balanced. Welcome back TWD!

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Click to Enlarge: There's always one more peanut butter bar...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes...

Monday 5 October 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x06 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE.

Well there we have it - Season 1 of Fear The Walking Dead is complete - and it was a pretty juicy climax to proceedings. Roll on Season 2, and consider us sufficiently salivating for Season 6 of TWD next week!

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Seriously, chill, you didn't have to wait long...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes **MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD**...

Saturday 3 October 2015

Anthropophagous (Joe D'Amato, 1980) DVD Review


Find more exploitation reviews here.

 
“It's not fear that tears you apart … it's him!” Formerly one of the most notorious 'Video Nasties' in the United Kingdom – where it was banned in 1984 at the height of the moral panic – Anthropophagous: The Beast, aka The Savage Island, is a flesh-devouring holiday in hell from Joe D'Amato (Love Goddess of the Cannibals, and the infamous Emmanuelle in America). However, even with it's grisly reputation, the film has some grander ideas at its core...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Wednesday 30 September 2015

Flavours of the Month: September 2015...

Spies who love themselves, irate hoteliers, and chaos under the sea, are just some of the vibes of my September 2015...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's looks, sounds, vibes & flavours...

Monday 28 September 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x05 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE.

Just one more episode left and the fan is really getting caked in the proverbial...

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Click to Enlarge: Yep...

Click "READ MORE" below to see the rest of this week's memes...

Friday 25 September 2015

Avengers: Age of Ultron: Mini Review...

What's it about?
Having once again got their mits on Loki's 'pokey stick' from Avengers Assemble, Tony Stark and Bruce Banner accidentally stuff themselves when they create the titular artificial intelligence, which promptly crafts itself a body, a father complex, and a plan to wipe out mankind. Perhaps Tony should have just sat on his arse and put his feet up for a change instead? Naturally the team have to fix another fine mess, while smashing the place up in grand fashion and throwing around a few quips.
Who would I recognise in it?
Robert Downey Jr, Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy Renner, James Spader, Samuel L. Jackson, Don Cheadle, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Elizabeth Olsen, Paul Bettany, Cobie Smulders, Anthony Mackie, Hayley Atwell, Idris Elba, Linda Cardellini, Stellan Skarsgard.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Not quite as strong as Avengers Assemble, which had a clearer and more defined plot, or Captain America: The Winter Soldier (the preceding entry in the Marvel movies), but thoroughly enjoyable all-the-same. Bursting at the seams with superhero wow-factor and movie star wattage, the light and dark elements of the story are well balanced, and there's so much spectacle to behold that one viewing isn't enough to take it all in...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue the review...

Monday 21 September 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x04 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE.

Only two episodes to go in the first season of Fear The Walking Dead and the fall of civilisation is gradually worsening ... chilling stuff!

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Click to Enlarge: Even in the apocalypse...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes...

Wednesday 16 September 2015

How Mr Snuffles III and Others Met Their Maker - NEW BOOK AVAILABLE NOW!


So I accidentally wrote a new book (as you do!), having originally intended to just do a little short story, and long story short it's now available in eBook and Paperback formats worldwide via Amazon.

Find out more information HERE.

Monday 14 September 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x03 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE.

We're half-way through the season now and the fan's starting to get fairly clogged up with the proverbial brown stuff ... I'm absolutely loving this show! It has exceeded my expectations and assuaged my initial fears with ease.

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: What a precocious little scamp...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes...

Saturday 12 September 2015

Fast and Furious 7: Mini Review...

What's it about?
The heavy-footed family are called back into action when Deckard Shaw - brother of #6's villain Owen Shaw - gets hungry for a spot of revenge (thus tying us in with Tokyo Drift at long last). Throw in an impressive macguffin called "God's Eye", cue a series of set pieces that boast an escalating amount of vehicular insanity, and Vin Diesel grumbling the word "family" at every given opportunity.
Who would I recognise in it?
Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jason Staham, Michelle Rodriguez, Dwayne Johnson, Tyrese Gibson, Chris Ludacris Bridges, Jordana Brewster, Kurt Russell, Nathalie Emmanuel, Djimon Hounsou, Tony Jaa, Lucas Black, Elsa Pataky.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Fast 7 will forever be overshadowed by the sudden death of Paul Walker - mid-shoot - in a car crash, and it's hard to view the film without that thought - and of CGI-infused body double fixes - lurking in the back of your mind. Even more-so considering the film's continued (and franchise-spanning) emphasis on the importance of family, one of the elements that has helped turn this franchise into a box office juggernaut...

Click "READ MORE" to continue the review...

Double Bill Mini Reviews: Bosses and Fighters...

Horrible Bosses 2:
What's it about?
Nick, Kurt, and Dale - the bumbling trio of boss-hating worker drones from the first movie - have all quit their jobs and set out on their own, establishing a business making 'Shower Buddys'. Naturally, they get screwed over by a horrible boss and things quickly spiral out of control as they seek to get their own back.
Who would I recognise in it?
Jason Bateman, Charlie Day, Jason Sudeikis, Jennifer Aniston, Chris Pine, Christoph Waltz, Jamie Foxx, Kevin Spacey, Jonathan Banks, Keegan-Michael Key.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Fairly solid plotting (relatively speaking) is left swinging in the wind thanks to a lack of jokes. After a slow start a few chuckles creep in, but all-too-often they rely on the 'bumbling and shouty trio' schtick that worked well in a lesser dose in the first movie. Here the same buffoonery takes centre stage at the expense of more interesting gags and starts to become grating at worst, and at best the dim-witted actions of Dale and Kurt in particular display chronic stupidity that's too stupid even for this movie's sense of logic. Jason Bateman was refreshingly candid about the film on a recent appearance on Marc Maron's WTF Podcast - everybody got paid, they had a good time, and they tried to improve upon a dodgy script. It's not a total disaster - there is an amount of fun to be had - but after the enjoyable silliness of the first movie, this sequel comes as a general disappointment. Alright.

Click "READ MORE" below for a rockin' rockumentary...

Monday 31 August 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x02 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE.

Episode 2 and things are starting to get out-of-hand: the proverbial is beginning it's sloppy journey towards the fan, canine and feline cohabitation and the like...

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: Old School Carl likes Alicia's style...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's batch of memes **SPOILER AHEAD**...

Sunday 30 August 2015

Flavours of the Month: August 2015...

Brooding detectives, super soldiers, underground spookiness, and more such things have been summing up my August 2015...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's looks, sounds, vibes & flavours...

Monday 24 August 2015

Fear The Walking Dead 1x01 memes...

Find more FTWD memes HERE

So we've finally had a look at what 'Fear The Walking Dead' is all about. When I first heard about the idea way back when I was a little wary of the idea, but having seen the opening episode, I must say I'm pleasantly surprised - and very much looking forward to the second episode.

Whether I end up doing memes for every episode (like I do with TWD) remains to be seen, but I had a couple of ideas that made me chuckle ... so here they are.

Click each image for FULL SIZE.

Click to Enlarge: If only...

Click "READ MORE" below for the rest of this week's memes...

Wednesday 19 August 2015

"Kung Fury" - rogue cops, laser raptors, and who else but those damn Nazis?

Okay, so I'm a little late to the party on this one, but with so much on the World Wide Web vying for your attention - and with the vast spread of 'clickbait' headlines hovering above wasteful nonsense that never delivers and is only there to 'generate hits' - sometimes you can overlook a good thing.

Sometimes you can overlook a great thing - like Kung Fury - a thirty minute short film from David Sandberg and Laser Unicorns Productions that crams in more neo-1980s fun than you can shake the entire decade at. In the words of the filmmakers themselves: "Kung Fury is an over-the-top 80’s action comedy that was crowd funded through Kickstarter. It features Kung Fury, a Kung Fu renegade cop who travels back in time to kill his Nemesis, Hitler. The film features nazis, dinosaurs, vikings and cheesy one-liners."



The full version of the film is freely available to watch on YouTube HERE.

It was sitting on my 'Watch Later' list for a couple of months, and when I finally got around to viewing it I thought to myself "Why on earth have I waited this long to watch this?!" - so in case you're not one of the 19.8 million hits that this fantastically crazy short film has received GO AND WATCH THIS NOW!

Click "READ MORE" below to continue...

Monday 17 August 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Trolls and Doppelgangers...

The Boxtrolls:
What's it about?
From stop motion animation studio Laika (Coraline, ParaNorman), this latest outing revolves around the titular box trolls - essentially scruffy little goblin handymen that live inside cardboard boxes - and the human populace of the world above who believe them to be vicious, man-eating ghouls after a small child is apparently kidnapped.
Who would I recognise in it?
Ben Kingsley, Jared Harris, Richard Ayoade, Tracy Morgan, Elle Fanning, Maurice LaMarche, Nick Frost (voices).
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
As per usual, Laika's visual style is superb - the setting here being a rickety Victorian-esque coastal town that rises up on a large hill - and the story doesn't seek to safely illuminate its darker recesses. The Boxtrolls themselves appear both demonic and lovable, depending on the perspective, with a similar mix applied to the human characters - particularly the main antagonist and his goons. The former is a class-obsessed Boxtroll chaser called Snatcher, weighed down by the weight of the chip on his shoulder and his obsession with cheese (a delicacy reserved for the rich 'white hat' folk). His goons, meanwhile, vary between monosyllabic creepiness and complex introspective musings on whether or not they truly are the 'good guys' (as they have been told by their increasingly sadistic boss). If ParaNorman didn't quite hit the high watermark of Coraline, The Boxtrolls certainly manages to attain the same level of intelligence, wit, fairytale whimsy, and darkness. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for a double dose of Jake Gyllenhaal...

Monday 10 August 2015

Contamination (Luigi Cozzi, 1980) Blu-Ray/DVD Review

Find more exploitation reviews here.


“They invade your body … control your mind … blow you apart!” If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then Ridley Scott and Dan O'Bannon (the Director and Writer of 1979's Alien) must have been blushing like schoolgirls when Luigi (Starcrash) Cozzi's gut-busting spin on their 'haunted house in space' shocker exploded onto the exploitation scene. Taking a handful of iconic images from Scott's film – including the alien eggs and the chest-burster scene – Contamination dispenses with subtlety and goes for spectacular slow-mo splatter...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Friday 31 July 2015

Flavours of the Month: July 2015...

Brooding detectives, nerdvana, 'black out years' tunes, darkly comic tales, and a great big thwack in the ribs are just some of what's been flavouring my July 2015...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's Looks, Sounds, Vibes & Flavours...

Monday 27 July 2015

Chappie: Mini Review...

What's it about?
In a crime-ridden near-future Johannesburg high tech police robots are put on the streets to clean things up. However, their creator has dreams of developing a truly sentient artificial intelligence, and opts to test his newly developed code on 'bot #22, which has been destined for scrap. Unluckily for him, he's kidnapped by a gang of criminals in-hoc to a crime lord for a hefty sum - and they want to use his skills and his sentient robot to facilitate their final heist.
Who would I recognise in it?
Sharlto Copley (voice and MoCap), Dev Patel, Hugh Jackman, Sigourney Weaver, Die Antwoord, and others.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
"Short Circuit" meets "RoboCop" by way of "District 9" ... did you dig those flicks? If you did, chances are you'll dig this too. Far better for a new film to take significant cues from earlier films and apply its own little something to it, than for movie fans to suffer yet another inferior remake. Numerous parallels can be drawn between "Chappie" and "RoboCop" in particular, but this is still unmistakably a Neill Blomkamp film - he even takes a few cues from his break out film "District 9"...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue the review...

Sunday 12 July 2015

Ash vs Evil Dead – Comic-Con Trailer Analysis




Watch the Official Trailer HERE and the Comic-Con Panel HERE.

Ash is back, baby! The trailer for the ten-part horror/comedy series from Starz premiered at Comic-Con 2015 and it's whipped up a bit of a fan frenzy – so let's dig into some of the highlights.

Boy Done Good:
So where's Ash gone since we last saw him? Not very far, it seems – if anything he's gone in reverse – living in a trailer hitched to the same car he's always had (just think of the time and money Ash must have spent restoring it after the events of the third film!), and now he's not even working at S-Mart. Now he has – so I presume – slid down the retail ladder to 'Value Stop' where he's still a Stockboy, re-living past glories as he tells his co-worker Pablo of his prior adventures: “I was the only one to escape, but now the evil has found me.” At least he's got himself a new prosthetic hand – a bit more fitting to 21st Century life than that bulky steel contraption from the last movie … maybe whatever magic that made it function wore off? “You won't see that hand, but that's all I'll say,” teased Raimi in response to a fan question on the matter of Ash's substitute hand at the Comic-Con Panel.


Ash, even in his prime, would be the wrong guy to save the world – now he's thirty years older and he has to save the world! I'm really worried for the world,” said Campbell of Ash's advancing years. “Crabby old man Ash.” Sam Raimi also noted some of Ash's continued (but loveable) foibles: that the character is “a heel, a coward, and a blow hard” but is also “a great monster hunter”. Still though, while he may be a bit down-at-heel (he's even revealed to be wearing dentures at one point – but could this just be a little joke only for the trailer?), Ash still knows how to wield a stump-mounted chainsaw – a moment in the trailer that pushed all the right buttons!

Click “READ MORE” below to continue this trailer analysis with more screenshots...

Saturday 11 July 2015

The Walking Dead Season 6 Comic-Con Trailer Analysis

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We both started out in the same place … you can come back from this, I know you can” says Rick, but who is he talking to? Is it Morgan? It likely is, but what could Rick be referring to? Has Morgan done something terribly wrong between when we last saw him in Season 3 and now? “Good people, they always die – I'm a killer, Rick, and you are too,” responds Morgan, supporting Rick's view that you shouldn't take chances – but does this have a loaded meaning? Is Morgan unsure of Rick's intentions – his sanity, even – after the close of Season 5 which saw Rick kill an enraged and beaten Pete right in front of Morgan?


You get out of here and you don't ever come back,” says Morgan in another part of the trailer, at which point we cut to Rick. Clearly the folks behind The Walking Dead want to give us an idea of Morgan and Rick being potential enemies in Season 6, or at the very least two sides of a contentious argument. The editors of these trailers are notoriously tricksy, and when you look closely you see numerous instances where two different scenes have been stitched together to seemingly form one scene. There will surely be a clash between the two men – but will it be quite as angry as the trailer suggests? Could it even be a double bluff?

Click "READ MORE" below to continue this analysis of the Comic-Con trailer for The Walking Dead Season 6...

Friday 3 July 2015

Blood and Black Lace (Mario Bava, 1964) Blu-Ray/DVD Review

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“Guaranteed! The 8 greatest shocks ever filmed!” Mario Bava (A Bay Of Blood) established the basic thematic template of the Italian giallo film with the Hitchcock-influenced The Girl Who Knew Too Much in 1963 before laying out – in full-bodied colour – the visual essence of what would become an iconic movement in Italian cinema. Vibrant splashes of pink and blue, red and green, filled the off-kilter frame as the camera glided through shadowy corridors. Bava, a former lighting cameraman, also made full use of the frame in all dimensions, with action frequently taking place throughout the entirety of his meticulous compositions – side-to-side, top-to-bottom, front-to-back. Excess, violence, and sex are common visual and narrative themes in gialli, and here in Blood and Black Lace – essentially the second ever giallo film – Bava unleashed a beast...


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Thursday 2 July 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Butt Monsters and Wolf Cops...

Bad Milo:
What's it about?
A stressed-out guy struggles to deal with his problems, so naturally a murderous beast shoots out of his butt and starts killing people!
Who would I recognise in it?
Ken Marino, Gillian Jacobs, Patrick Warburton, Stephen Root, Peter Stormare, and others.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
It's a movie about a monster that comes out of a guy's arse and goes around killing people, what's not to enjoy here? Snappy, gory, and enjoyably silly, fans of dark comedy and practical puppet F/X (sometimes like the sweet/sour mix of Gremlins) will have plenty to chuckle over. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for WolfCop...

Tuesday 30 June 2015

Flavours of the Month: June 2015...

Italian horror in high definition, true crime with a hepcat rhythm, and a short story that became a novelette are just a handful of the things that defined my June 2015 - read on for the rest...

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's looks, sounds, vibes & flavours...

Friday 26 June 2015

"How Mr Snuffles III and Others Met Their Maker"...

I had a sudden spark of inspiration a couple of weeks ago, and so, instead of getting stuck in to some deep planning on my next screenplay (working title of "A Sideline In Vengeance"), I've found myself bashing away at "How Mr Snuffles III and Others Met Their Maker" - a dark comedy set in the Celebrityville universe.

Initially I was thinking of it as a short story, but - being that I'm now 5,000 words deep with plenty of ground left to cover - it's looking likely that it'll extend into 'novelette' territory. What's a novelette? A story that's between 7,500 and 17,500 words (at which point a 'novella' takes over, up to the 'novel' crossover line of 40,000 words)...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue reading...

Sunday 14 June 2015

The Case of the Scorpion's Tail (Sergio Martino, 1971) DVD Review


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“You know I'm dying to see you.” Sergio Martino – one of Italy's finest journeymen filmmakers – helmed an impressive run of giallo films during the early 1970s. Following on from the sublime The Strange Vice of Mrs Wardh (1970) came The Case of the Scorpion's Tail, a densely-plotted thriller/morality play packed with infidelity and greed – as well as a some particularly flashy murder sequences...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Friday 12 June 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Smith's Weird Whimsy, and Near-Future Chaos...

Tusk:
What's it about?
A snarky podcaster heads to Canada to interview a viral video sensation, only to end up in the home of one Mr Howard How - a curious old man, confined to a wheelchair and a solitary life - who has many interesting stories to tell. However, the old man's fixation on the mighty walrus takes a sinister and creepy turn.
Who would I recognise in it?
Justin Long, Michael Parks, Haley Joel Osment, Genesis Rodriguez, Johnny Depp.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Birthed from an episode of Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier's "SModcast" podcast, in which they extrapolated a bizarre Gumtree advert into a horror film idea, Tusk is very much the product of Smith's new found invigoration for filmmaking. The idea went from a detailed and marijuana-induced giggle to a full-blown film in a matter of months, which affords this strange outing from the writer/director of Clerks et al a sense of immediacy. Low budget and high concept - a maniac seeks to turn his latest victim into the perfect walrus - it's an out-there experience that's as disturbing as it is bewildering.

Crammed-full with in-jokes that attentive SModcast network fans will appreciate, Tusk's immediacy also presents some problems. There are some structural issues that might have benefited from a little extra work - the Guy LaPointe scenes are heartily entertaining, but necessitate a sudden change of gear and shift in focus - but might more time for script tweaks have robbed the film of some of it's vim and vigour? The cast all seem to be having an absolute blast, and undoubtedly stealing the whole show - similar to the case of Smith's previous film Red State - is Michael Parks, who explores the various recesses of his deeply disturbed Mr How. Featuring some wacky - and quease-inducing - practical effects work from Robert Kurtzman, Kevin Smith's latest piece of whimsy is a curious beast. It is a film that has divided its audience, and will continue to do so, but - much like Justin Long's game performance - will haunt your thoughts for a long while. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for The Purge: Anarchy...

Thursday 11 June 2015

Double Bill Mini Musings: Troubled Grooves and Opening Night Jitters...

Inherent Vice:
What's it about?
A complex tale situated at the death of the 1960s in and around the fictional seaside L.A. area of Gordita Beach, in which Private Investigator Larry "Doc" Sportello becomes involved in a twisted, sprawling string of crimes including, but not limited to, kidnap, murder, fraud, and drug trafficking. Based on the novel by Thomas Pynchon.
Who would I recognise in it?
Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Brolin, Owen Wilson, Katherine Waterston, Reese Witherspoon, Benicio Del Toro, Jena Malone, Maya Rudolph, Martin Short, and more.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Not quite Writer/Director Paul Thomas Anderson's best, but pretty close. Read the book and then watch the film for the best viewing experience. Don't try to unwind every mystery and understand every event - that's not the point - indeed, as Anderson himself said, the best thing to do is just let the movie wash over you. It's more about an atmosphere and an experience, than a neatly tied-up story. Even with some nips and tucks moving from book to film (the whole Vegas angle is reduced to a brief newspaper headline, various side characters' parts are reduced or removed, etc) Anderson manages to remain strikingly true to the source material, so much so that - at times - the film feels more like a book than it does a movie. The pacing and rhythms are different to your usual film, while Pynchon's world is beautifully recreated - cannily helped by deploying the side character of Sortilege as the narrator. Undoubtedly it's a divisive film, but it is one that will find its audience in the home viewing market, where it will reveal deeper layers with repeated viewings. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for Elijah Wood tinkling the ivories...

Sunday 7 June 2015

Sabotage: Mini Review...

What's it about?
A team of hard-as-nails DEA agents pinch a cool $10 million during a raid on a cartel stronghold and stash it for later - but when they return for it, they find it missing. Then, soon afterwards, the team starts getting picked off one-by-one.
Who would I recognise in it?
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sam Worthington, Olivia Williams, Terrence Howard, Joe Manganiello, Josh Holloway, Mireille Enos, and more.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Testosterone overload ahoy in David Ayer's tough-as-old-boots thriller which plays out more as a murder mystery than a straight-faced action fest. That's not to say it's light on adrenaline - it's not, because there's eruptions of blood-splattering violence throughout (eviscerated and nailed to a ceiling, anyone?) - but the hard-hitting, teeth-gritting gruffness of it all is mixed with a complex who-dunnit plot...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue the review...

Monday 1 June 2015

The Washing Machine (Ruggero Deodato, 1993) DVD Review


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“A man, cut up into pieces, and stuffed in there like soiled linen.” Ruggero Deodato – a name synonymous with one film in particular: the utterly notorious Cannibal Holocaust – but what of some of the other highlights from his varied career? His name has also been attached to the likes of House on the Edge of the Park (a spin on The Last House on the Left) and Phantom of Death (Basil Exposition ages disgracefully) … but, like most Italian directors, he also lent his talents to the world of the giallo film. However, in the case of the curiously-titled The Washing Machine (aka Vortice Mortale), the sultry sex appeal of the 1970s had long gone and, in this case, been replaced by a post-Cold War hangover and pastel track suits...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Sunday 31 May 2015

Flavours of the Month: May 2015...

This month I polished off the excellent "South Park: The Stick of Truth" (shame about the constant loading screens, though), gave the show's 18th season a quick second spin, and indulged in the superb "6 Days To Air: The Making of South Park" documentary ... there's also been an awful lot of Rob Zombie, plenty of writing, crackin' telly, and the glamorous thrills of the Monaco F1 weekend among the flavours of my May 2015...

Friday 29 May 2015

Cold In July: Mini Review...

What's it about?
A pulp thriller set in 1989 in which a humble family man, a picture framer by trade, kills an intruder in his home only to be flung into an ever darkening criminal underworld in which vengeance will cleanse the wicked. From Jim Mickle, the director of Stake Land, and based on the book by Joe R. Lansdale.
Who would I recognise in it?
Michael C. Hall, Don Johnson, Sam Shephard, Vinessa Shaw, Wyatt Russell and others.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Taking stylistic cues from John Carpenter (who is acknowledged directly in the credits) - from the titles font to the pounding pulse of the synth soundtrack - this brooding thriller combines exploitation thrills with slick production value. Taught, efficient, and disturbing throughout, the film's 80s aesthetic is simultaneously played for smiles and realism. Triumphant hair metal and nascent mobile phones on one hand, video rental stores and old school machismo on the other. Blood, guns, and damaged male bonding is where it's at here, as fraught explosions of violence and gore blend into a pulse-pounding, primary-coloured haze of no-nonsense Southern darkness. Indeed, the colour scheme - rich blues, greens, and literal washes of blood-red light - seems to take some inspiration from Jason Eisener's "Hobo With A Shotgun"; this is like a neo-grindhouse revenger with some decent money to its name. A thoroughly effective thriller with a dark heart and an electro-groove. On the cusp of Great.

Friday 22 May 2015

The Sister of Ursula (Enzo Milioni, 1978) DVD Review


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“Terrible things are going to happen, I see blood.” The 1970s were the swinging heyday of Italian 'giallo' cinema with a veritable glut of gruesome and sexy thrillers filling silver screens far and wide. However, by 1978 gialli were becoming a bit worn out – but meanwhile the market for adult entertainment was exploding – and while many of Italy's pulp thrillers flirted with sexuality and eroticism, few straddled the line this side of full-blown flesh flicks quite like Enzo Milioni's The Sister of Ursula...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Tuesday 19 May 2015

Short stories and other writing projects...

Recently I've been working on some short stories, a form I used to write in a number of years ago, but from which I got distracted by other creative endeavours. In addition to using the short story format to further improve my writing and try out some things, I'm also pursuing it for competitions as well as submissions to publications that specialise in short stories.

Right now I've just started putting together "We Should Eat Ice Cream Too" (sci-fi), and I've also got "The Seventh Rub" (no particular genre and more of a personal tale), and "Dug Deep" (horror). "Dug Deep" is a ghost story situated in a collapsed mine as trapped workers are painstakingly being rescued, while "The Seventh Rub" deals with the issue of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. "We Should Eat Ice Cream Too" - a subtle kind of sci-fi story - deals with themes of immigration, societal cohesion, and family - particularly fathers and sons...

Click "READ MORE" below to continue this post...

Wednesday 13 May 2015

Manborg (Steven Kostanski, 2011) DVD Review...


Find more DVD reviews here.


“Remember, it's not about the killing, it's about family.” Astron-6, the crazy VHS-loving movie making machines behind the Troma-tastic Father's Day and the much anticipated neo-giallo The Editor, have been cranking out bizarre shorts and features that appeal to the very best of 80s nostalgia for years. 'Lazer Ghosts' and 'Bio-Cops' are one thing, but then there's Manborg – a low-fi large scale action sci-fi chaos-mobile featuring Nazi demons, laser battles, and a home-made future dystopia...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Sunday 3 May 2015

Galaxy of Terror (B.D. Clark, 1981) Review


Find more exploitation movie reviews here.


“ALIEN Was Just The Beginning … Hell Has Just Been Relocated!” Produced by Roger Corman – on a relatively handsome budget of $700,000 – if Battle Beyond The Stars (1980) was New World Pictures' answer to 1977's Star Wars, then Galaxy of Terror was clearly their less-than-subtle take on Ridley Scott's Alien (1979). Swapping out H.R. Giger's iconic xenomorphs for – among other things – a giant and rapacious worm-thing – and sticking with the basic setup (oblivious crew sent to a hostile planet to investigate suspicious goings on), Bruce D. Clark's sci-fi horror nonetheless throws up some pleasing surprises...


Click “READ MORE” below to continue the review and see more screenshots…

Wednesday 29 April 2015

Flavours of the Month: April 2015...

There's been a pervasive amount of Rob Zombie scattered throughout my April 2015, from his music (solo efforts and early White Zombie) to some of his cinematic outings such as "House of 1000 Corpses" and "The Devil's Rejects" ... but that's just a little of what's been tickling my fancy for entertainment.

Click "READ MORE" below for this month's looks, sounds, vibes and flavours...

Monday 27 April 2015

Triple Bill Mini Musings: Bling, Deja-vu, and Clanging Metal...

The Bling Ring:
What's it about?
Based on a true story. A gang of self-involved, celebrity-obsessed teenage Californian materialists fulfil their narcissistic urges by stalking the Internet to find out which celebs are out of town and then - after Googling their home addresses - robbing them.
Who would I recognise in it?
Emma Watson, Leslie Mann, Taissa Farmiga, Gavin Rossdale, Paris Hilton.
Great/Good/Alright/Shite?
Sofia Coppola was starting to drift into slightly pompous territory with the sedated and meandering likes of Somewhere (melancholy movie star mopes around The Chateau Marmont for 90 minutes), but thankfully The Bling Ring injects a boost of glitzy, glamorous energy. Comment is rarely made in a direct manner, instead Coppola observes her protagonists without explicit judgement. Their actions are clearly wrong; their lives are founded on parental disinterest, prescription pills, and TMZ. The word "love" is reduced to a cheap affectation drizzled over the nearest object that briefly catches their eye, as they lazily chase dreams of reaching grandiose levels of self-worship. There is a bizarre thrill afforded to the wide-eyed raids on the unlocked (!!!) homes of the (absent) rich and famous, and a simultaneous sense of chic-revulsion. As grotesque as these people's lives are (vapid, soul-less, blissfully ignorant), the performances are universally strong and the pacing is brisk. The film is a little lacking in drama, but ultimately it's satisfyingly damning (from a distance) about the vulgarity of celebrity lifestyle obsession gone mad. Good.

Click "READ MORE" below for some Olympus and Optimus...